Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I am one with the molecules
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
