I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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