I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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