Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
