Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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