We're like a lot better than the average bears
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Even my vagina gasped.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I need to align my fucking chakras
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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