i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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