We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
