i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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