He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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