Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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