i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I need water and some morals
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize
