what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
