Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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