what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
