ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
