Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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