Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
