All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
