Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
