i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
