Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
