I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
