Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You can't just leave with hair like that
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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