to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
