yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
