I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
