So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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