If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
