I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
This is my gift to your gina
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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