I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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