Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
