I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I want to fling myself into the sun
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
