I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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