i think i have two assholes
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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