I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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