Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize