Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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