We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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