Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
