just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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