ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
