yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
