He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
