You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
