You're my little dorito
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
