Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Can you bring me the toilet please
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
