its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
