Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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