So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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